Exploration 5: Alexis Evans

1. The character that has meant the most to me so far would have to be Esther. I think she is the next character down most important in the story then Ishmael. She has the attitude of never giving up on something or someone whom I think would be very important to have when dealing in this time period of the Civil War. These boys have gone through a lot, and they need more people like Esther to care about them because most of them haven’t been shown they are cared about since they lost their families. I think it is good that Ismael has someone to talk to, “I only liked talking to her because I felt that she didn’t judge me for what I have been a part of” (Page 166). I believe everyone needs someone like Esther to talk to, because all those memories would be hard to keep to you when it was in fact a part of their childhood.

2. I think the rehabilitation is possible with time. However, it would be scary at first him living in my neighborhood after knowing what he’s capable of doing, but he is just a child and deserves a chance at a normal life. These kids didn’t choose this to be what they did for several years. It chose them, and it was either fight and survive and or to be killed.

3. A specific convention that I thought was important was how Ismael describes and talks about his dreams he has. On page 164, Ismael explains his dream in strong detail. This dream was once again about death. He describes how he falls off his bed and has to walk outside. This was also the first time he dreamt about his family since they were taken away from him. By Ismael explaining to the readers his dreams, it lets us get into his head and feel what he is going through.

4. The passage I picked would be on page 160, “I had told someone, a civilian, about my experience. I hated the “It’s not your fault” line that staff members said every time anyone spoke about the war.” I think this passage impacted me because I couldn’t imagine being constantly told that every time you spoke about the war and basically your childhood. At first, it would probably be good to hear, but after several times I would see where it would get very annoying.

Exploration 5 Mackenzie

1) The nurse meant the most to me so far.  I found her very interesting and intriguing with her desire to get Ishmael to open up.  She really wanted Ishmael to trust her and that I think was something Ishmael needed in his life.  He needed someone to show they cared and be there for him.  She wanted Ishmael to trust her so bad that she went to the extent to get a Walkman and a tape for him in listen to, in the hope that he would gain trust for her.

2) Ishmael's rehabilitation to me is a very good thing, but it seems to be very challenging. Ishmael refuses to let go of the war and that is what is creating a problem. I do however think that it is possible for Ishmael to complete his rehabilitation. It is just going to take longer than anticipated; he still had his stubborn mind and protective instincts, along with his desire to kill the rebels. I definitely would not want Ishmael to move into my neighborhood in the state he is in. Ishmael seems very violent and unable to control himself and some points, therefore him moving into my neighborhood would seem so very unsafe. He has lost his ability to handle his emotions and that is not stable enough for living in a neighborhood with other children and people he may harm.

3) The convention that I think Ishmael uses particularly well is sense details.  He really knows how to bring the setting to life.  One of my favorite examples was based off of a dream he was having on page 149.  "I would dream that a faceless gunman had tied me up and begun to slit my throat with the zigzag edge of the bayonet. I would feel the pain that the knife inflicted as man sawed my neck.  I'd wake up sweating and throwing punches in the air".  It is the way he describes his dream and what is happening to him that really gets me interested in what he is saying.

4) "She threw a package at me. I held it in my hand, wondering what it was and why she had gotten it for me.  She was looking at me, waiting for me to open it.  When I unwrapped it, I jumped up and hugged her, but immediately held back my happiness".  This passage on page 154 really stuck out to me because Ishmael was truly happy for a minute, although he was trying to hold it back.  Esther got him something that he never thought he would see again, he was able to do and listen to something that he was truly passionate about and that is what made it so great.  Esther showed Ishmael that he could trust her and how much she really cared about Ishmael. 

Exploration 5: Benjy Fournier

Esther has had the biggest impact on me.  The fact that she put so much time and energy into helping Ismael is very inspiring to me.  "Why did you get me this Walkman if we are not friends?"  This is a physical example of how Esther tries to help Ismael.  There are many other emotional examples that Esther does to help.  I find in amazing how she feels so passionately about her job.  Her caring so much about helping Ismael is inspiring to me and gives me goosebumps thinking about.

I feel that Ismael is very lucky to be getting this rehabilitation.  He is very strong minded and I feel confident in putting forth the effort to rehabilitate him, which the nurse must have felt too considering the amount of effort she put in to help him.  The signs of improvement he has already shown are substantial and lead me to believe that he is fully capable of being completely fixed.  So, once he has finished his treatment, I would feel comfortable with him in my neighborhood.  He is a good kid deep down, and once he digs deep and finds that good kid, he will in no way be a threat to society.

A repeated convention Beah uses in the entire book is foreshadowing.  A specific example of this is the passage "But everything was about to change in the last weeks of January 1996.  I like the way he uses a lot of foreshadowing because it leads into dramatic events well, and adds a nice flavor to the writing.

" Why had the lieutenant decided to give us up to these civilians?  We thought that we were part of the war until the end.  The squad had been our family."  This quote and the following paragraphs were greatly impacting to me because it shows how truly messed up Ismael was from the war.  He was so brainwashed to kill that he did not want to leave the violence for safety.  It really helps the reader to understand just how much the war effected the thinking of the young boys.

Justin Cygnor Exploration 5

1. A character that stood out to me from chapter 18 was Tommy. He is Ishmael's uncle whom he has never met. After meeting Ishmael in the the center that he had been in, Tommy allowed Ishmael to live with him and his new family. This was the first time we really see Ishmael in a calm state of mind. We can feel his sense of satisfaction when he says "I loved the walks with my uncle because it gave me a chance to talk about my childhood, about growing up with my father and older brother." This shows that Ishmael has held on to the past experiences even after the war had changed him.

2. I think Ishmael's rehabilitation was working. At the start he was very destructive and violent. The leaders of the center just said that it wasn't his fault so he and the other boys continued to be harmful. Eventually after a certain amount of time with Esther, Tommy, and engaging in activities like the talent show, I think Ishmael started coming back to his senses. I would allow him to move into my neighborhood after signs of destructive behavior were gone which I think is likely to occur.

3. When Ishmael describes the story of when he was shot in the foot to Esther, the setting and the language really put the reader in the scene. He goes into great detail about the pain he was in and the procedures that were performed in the med center. "A piercing pain rushed up my spine from my waist to the back of my neck. I fainted." This quote is an example of the language used to describe the pain that occurred after he was shot.

4. The first paragraph of chapter 16 really stands out to me. It describes Ishmael's feelings towards the civilians taking care of him and the 14 boys with him. He said just hearing the voices of the civilians made him angry and aggressive. " It was infuriating to be told what to do by civilians. Their voices, even when they called us to breakfast, enraged me so much that I would punch the wall, my locker, or anything I was standing next to. They had all they needed to survive including food. Ishmael describes that they were all unhappy even with the resources to live. They only wanted their guns and weed. This shows the reader how "off" the boys were after they stopped fighting.

Exploration 5-Jill Reed

1. Esther in my opinion has impacted me the most so far. She has been the first person so far to actually somewhat get through to Ishmel. He had his gaurd up with everyone for awhile until she came along. He was not thrilled of her at first. He was rude to her. But he started to let his gaurd down once she gave him his gift and he saw that she might be able to be trusted becuase trust is a big thing with Ishmel right now. "I jumped up and hugged up but immediately held back my happiness"(Beah 154). This quote shows that Ishmel was happy for once and Esther was the cause.

2. In my opinion, anyone who has been in a war and has gone through things that Ishmel has gone through is going to have problems to overcome. I think he is making progress and opening up to nurses. I think it was a big step that he agreed to go to the other hospital to get looked at. He might still have nightmares but with help I think he will improve. I would not mind if he lived in my neighborhood. I have a solider who is my neighbor who seved in Iraq and he has PTSD but he is still a very nice and caring person.

3. I think Beah uses figuartive language very well in the novel. We are able to really get a sense of what Ishmel is feeling and how grusome things are. "I do not know what happend, but when I woke up the next day I felt as if I had nails hammered into my bones of my foot and my veins were being chiseled." (Beah 157). This was after Ishmel had the bullet taken from his foot. We get a sense of how horrible it must have been and the pain that he was put through. I could just imagine my veins being chiseled and how bad that would hurt.

4. "I was quiet for a bit, as I didnt knwo what to say and also didnt trust anyone at this point in my life. I had learned to survive and take care of myself. I had done just that for most of my short life, with no one to trust, and frankly, I liked being alone, since it made surviving easier." (Beah 153). I really think this passage stands out. It shows how the fighting and the war has impacted Ishmel. He can not trust anyone. He has been on his one and survived on his own. He has had to make his own decisions and learn to adapt to different problems. Now that someone is actually here to take care of him and help him like Esther, he is having a hard time being able to trust her. It impacted me because trust is a big thing to have and once you lose trust it is really hard to regain it and get it back. I think if I went through what Ishmel was going through it would take me forever to trust someone again.

Exploration 5 Courtney Shaffer

1. Esther is a really important character in this story in my opinion. She has meant a lot because when you look back at Ishmael when he first came to rehabilition he was a mess, he couldn't control himself and his thoughts. She has helped him come a long way and the fact that Ismael has been so irrated and hates when everyone, including Esther, says "It's not your fault" "None of these things are your fault." Ishmael says one day when talking to Esther, "Even though I heard that phrase from every staff member-and frankly I ad always hated it-I began that day to believe it" (Beah 165). Ismael also says, "I had become very fond of Esther, but refused to show it" (Beah 168). Ishmael has been unable to trust anyone or enjoy the presence of anyone because of the war and Esther is helping him come to these things again slowly.

2. I do think that Ishmael's rehabilitation is possible, but I think it's going to take years and not everything will help him become completley normal again. He will always remember the things that have happened to him but rehabilitation will help him find ways to try and keep his mind off these things and back into his daily life. I wouldn't have an opinion if he moved into my neighborhood after rehabilition because I don't think that he's trying to cause fights and violence.

3. A specific convention of narrative that I want to talk about it interior monologue. I think Beah uses this well because he's writing the story about himself and his story so the interior monologue is really real. An example of this would be when Ishmael met his uncle for the first time ever, the man he was going to live with, he says, "...I didn't know what to do in my happy state. I was still hesitant to let myself let go, because I still believed in the fragility of happiness" (Beah 173). This explains how Ishmael feels on the inside. He's revealing his inner thoughts and feelings to us.

4. A passage that really struck me by the writing was on page 158 in the third paragraph. It's a long paragraph but one part from it that's very descriptive is, "...The doctor stuck a crooked-looking scissors inside my wound and fished for the bullet. I could feel the edge of the metal inside me. My entire body was racked with pain. My bones became sour. Just when I thought I had had enough, the doctor abruptly pulled the bullet out. A peircing pain rushed up my spine from my waist to the back of my neck. I fainted" (Beah 158). This impacted me because it is so descriptive I felt as if I was there with him. It helps to makes you really understand the story and what he was going through.

Exploration 5 Cameron Watson

Other than Ishmael I believe that Esther, the nurse has the biggest impact on me so far.  She’s really only in the end of one chapter and the whole next but overall she has affected Ismael in the biggest way possible.  She continues to tell him that “It’s not your fault.”  Even though at the beginning, Ishmael refuses to listen and receive and sympathy from her, he gradually warms up to her and begins to tell her his story and why he is and the way he is today.  An example from the book is in chapter 17, page 154 when Esther gives Ismael a gift.  The gift is a Walkman and even though Ismael is hesitant at first, this is the first step towards realization and opening up. 

I believe that it truly isn’t Ishmael’s fault he is the way that he is.  The life he has lived is hard and demanding.  A life that no kid should have, and because of this, the rehabilitation process will take time for him to fully recover.  It will take time like I said, but I believe that with the right care and guidance, Ishmael will soon become the loving caring young man he once was.  At first I would be scared honestly to know that I had a child soldier who is currently recovering living in my neighborhood, but eventually I would realize that he is trying hard and I would do anything I could to make him feel safe and that he belonged. 

The best sensory detail that I believe Beah uses in his story is sensory details.  There are countless times throughout the book where I stop, close my eyes, and imagine what it was like for him in Sierra Leone and the hardships that he constantly faced.  An example is in Chapter 11 page 95, “My entire body went into shock.  Only my eyes moved, slowly opening and closing.  I tried to shake my legs to get my blood flowing, but I Fell to the ground, holding my face.  On the ground I felt as if my eyes were growing too big for their sockets.” 

My favorite passage that spoke and still speaks to me is in chapter six on the first page, “People stopped trusting each other, and every stranger became an enemy.  Even people who knew you became extremely careful about how they related or spoke to you.”  That right there is what this story in my opinion is formed and shaped around.  Friends will be torn apart, families will be separated, and nothing was the same or ever will be normal again.